Surprise! I Still Love the Hell out of You

Two years into parenthood… Not a single break. Four years in… and still, not one break. At five years, one month and twenty-one days later we finally got our first break from being fulltime parents.

Since the day my son was born, one of us was present for the first five-plus years of his life. And yet, I love my wife more now than I ever have. How she can even tolerate me at this point is beyond my comprehension.

This is not completely unusual. A couple we have befriended from New Zealand, who now resides in New Jersey, are thousands of miles away from their respective families. That’s rough – and they have THREE kids – add that to the equation and these two parents represent superheroes.

But like them, my wife and I have each other. That is a blessing no one should take for granted… ever.

For men who may not have family nearby to help or those whose parents are too elderly to watch a two-year-old, the result is on par with a soldier’s ‘thousand-yard stare.’ It’s a term that was used to describe Vietnam war veterans and their near-death experience from warfare. It is more common for those of us raised by single parents – sometimes local support simply doesn’t exist. For parents in this situation, it’s what I refer to as the ‘thousand-day glare.’

What’s a supportive and loving husband supposed to do in this circumstance? Surprise your wife. It’s the only short-term remedy you can offer to your spouse and it can go a long way.

•    Does she love rock and roll? Get a sitter and surprise her with concert tickets.

•    Is the spa her thing? Get a daytime sitter and schedule a  massage for her, or both of you if that’s your thing. If not, pick her up in a couple of hours and enjoy a meal together.

•    Does she love sports? If so, damn you’re lucky! Book the sitter for half a day and go with her to a game.

Make it about her and make sure she is completely in the dark. She’ll love you for it.

Then shag like minks on a hot summer day. Just make sure the kid’s asleep and the babysitter is gone. Otherwise, you’ll give yourself…

Blue Balls.

One thought on “Surprise! I Still Love the Hell out of You

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  1. I’ve found that pursuing my wife, even in the little things works as well. Taking her out on a date is awesome, but sometimes, it’s the little things that you can do daily that help bring life back into focus. She really appreciates a random text through the day saying you are thinking about her or how you appreciate her. Flowers on a random occasion (other than the required dates) are nice. Bringing home dinner and saying, “Honey, I got the kids tonight, why don’t you go take a bath and just relax” can put a huge deposit in the old emotional bank account. Thanks for the post!

    Liked by 1 person

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